Show: Family Matters
Season: 3 Episode: 2
Title: Brain Over Braun
Original Air Date: September 27, 1991
Favorite Quotes:* Harriet: Carl are you sure we can afford this trip?
Carl: No, but sometimes you just have to go for it. As long as there are no unexpected expenses we are on our way.
* Harriet: It’s going to cost a fortune to fix the roof. We’ll have to cancel our vacation.
Carl: No, no, not cancel just postpone. I’ll fix the roof myself.
Harriet: And I’ll buy a sparkle gown and open for Diana Ross.
* Harriet: Wake up, you’re dreaming Carl.
* Laura: Steve, how long have you been standing there?
Steve: Long enough for your high-pitched squeals of lust to shatter my heart.
* Carl: Wow, its its its really high up here. I didn’t realize I had such a tall house.
Eddie: You need a tall house because you have a tall son.
* Steve: I merely wish to issue a friendly warning: stay away from my Laura.
* Alex: Thanks Urkel. I know I look good, but you made me look great.
* Alex: Ok Urkel, why don’t you put your money where your mouth is.
Waldo: Don’t do it, Urkel, money has germs on it.
* Steve: I hurt in places that I need three mirrors to see.
* Steve: You know Laura, I feel like the reason you don’t love me is because I’m weak.
Laura: That’s not true. There’s lots of reasons why I don’t love you.
Steve: Really? Well name a couple.
Laura: Well, you’re stubborn, irritating, loud, obnoxious, pushy, clumsy.
Steve: I said a couple.
* Laura: You’re not acting like the Steve Urkel I’ve come to know and tolerate. That Steve Urkel would get out of this jam by using the biggest muscle he has, his brain.
* Laura: No wonder he’s so handsome, God put all his good qualities on the outside.
* Alex: That’s for you, baby.
Laura: Put your shirt on.
Maxine: Couldn’t we have taken a vote?
* Steve: Feast your eyes one last time and then hit the road, Jack.
* Rachael: Carl, what happened?
Harriet: He fixed the roof.
Rachel: Ah, enough said.
* Carl: The bottom line is that I fixed the roof.
Harriet: Yes, Carl you fixed the roof and all it cost you was an arm and a leg.
The Winslow’s are looking at brochures for vacation. They discuss cost as Harriet is worried. Carl tells her as long as there are no unexpected expenses it’ll be fine. But suddenly, there’s lightning. Water starts coming in through the ceiling. It lands right on the vacation brochure. Harriet is sad. When Carl says he’ll fix it Harriet is unimpressed. She points out that he can’t do it. She then reminds him what happened when he tried to fix his mothers toilet. He then gets upset and lists the ways he is discouraged from trying to fix things. He insists that he will fix the roof and do such a good job that all the neighbors will applaud his work. She is not amused and exits. Later, Laura and Maxine come in the house excited. Urkel comes in the kitchen in a rain outfit, the girls did not see him. Alex has asked Laura if she wants to study with him. They then notice Steve. Laura is not happy. He tells her how upsetting it is to hear her speak of another man and demonstrates arrows piercing him. He falls backwards over the couch. Neither girl even checks to see if he is ok. Urkel pops up looking sad. Another day, Carl and Eddie are on the roof. Carl is nervous about the height. Eddie pats Carl on the back, he loses his balance and starts to slide down the roof. He then pulls up the toolbox. Eddie is unsure why he always gets dragged into these situations. After pulling up the toolbox, he loses it and it slides back off the roof. He has a screwdriver and uses it to try and find a soft spot. But Eddie takes a faster approach and walks around on the roof. Suddenly, he falls through and lands on the couch. Harriet asks him how its going up there. It’s now gym class. Urkel wants to chat with Alex. Maxine and Laura come to a window at the gym to watch. The gym teacher announces it’s rope climb day. Steve is upset because he can’t do it. Alex does it quickly. The teacher calls on Steve. He can’t climb the rope though. They have to go run laps. Urkel gives him a challenge. The bet is that the loser stays away from Laura, forever. Alex agrees.
Two weeks later, Steve is trying to work out in the gym. Laura finds him trapped under a barbell, which she easily lifts off him. She is concerned. She touches his shoulder, and he screams in pain. He asks for a back rub. She agrees but threatens to stop when he makes noises. He tells her his weakness is why she doesn’t love him. But she tells him that has nothing to do with it. He asks for a few reasons; she gives him a long list. She tells him she likes his intelligence. She reminds him that his brain is his biggest muscle. Back on the roof, Carl tells Eddie about a rash he had. Carl then announces they are done fixing the roof. He breaks into song. Eddie joins him. They start dancing. Carl loses his footing and slides off the roof. The toolbox is tied to him. It also slides down the roof. It lands right on Carl. It’s now the day of the rope race. Alex comes in talking trash. As the gym teacher is going to leave, Waldo stops him. Alex does the rope climb in 4.9 seconds. Steve arrives, looking stranger than usual. He’s got a rocket pack. He flies up the rope climb in 3.2 seconds, setting a new record. Then manages to fly over to Laura and do a victory slam dunk. He lands safely as well. Laura comes running in, excited that Steve won. Harriet brings Carl home from the hospital. He has two casts and a crutch. He proudly points out that he did fix the roof. But Harriet rains on his moment by telling him it did cost him and arm and a leg. Laura comes in shocked with Carl’s condition. Harriet explains that Carl fixed the roof. Steve is with her, still wearing his rocket pack. He accidentally turns it on and then blasts through the just fixed roof. He can’t’ shut it off and looks like a comet flying through the sky.