Show: The Golden Girls
Season: 3 Episode: 13
Title: The Artist
Original Air Date: December 19, 1987
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Favorite Quotes:* Rose: Dorothy was Sophia naked just now or does her dress really need ironing?
* Blanche: I just stand there before him in all my lucious nakedness and somehow he manages to suppress the urge to throw me on the floor and ravish me.
Sophia: Please, if he throws you on the floor you’ll both end up in the apartment below.
* Rose: I’ve been posing for Lazlo too.
Blanche: Oh dear Lord strike me dead right here and now if that man prefers Rose Nylund over me.
* Blanche: He could go to Sea World if he wanted to see a naked whale.
* Dorothy: Oh, come on, Blanche. Did you really expect us to turn Lazlo down? You said yourself it was the chance to become immortalized in a classic work of art.
* Blanche: Horsepucky. You went for the same reason Rose did, to get your hands on my man.
* Sophia: Who’s Lazlo?
Rose: A Hungarian artist we’ve all been posing nude for.
Sophia: In the future a simple none of your business Sophia will suffice.
* Lazlo: It is not hard to understand why you are such good friends, you compliment each other very well indeed.
Sophia comes back from bingo without any clothes under her jacket. A practical joker at the senior center bingo game played a practical joke on her and messed up her clothes. Rose comes in and asks Sophia about her coat. Sophia flashes her as she exits the room. Blanche arrives with an artist from her museum. His name is Lazlo. All three ladies have a thing for him. He bids them farewell and exits. Blanche tells them that Lazlo has asked her to pose for one of his sculptures. The piece will be on display at the museum once complete. Another day in the kitchen and Sophia plays a prank on Dorothy with a dribble glass. Blanches joins them in the kitchen and insults Dorothy. She asks Sophia to give Blanche a glass of orange juice. She’s now posed for Lazlo for a week. She is surprised that he hasn’t broken professionalism with her yet. The doorbell rings and Blanche drinks a bunch of the orange juice but gets no dribble. Rose answers the door for Lazlo. They discuss the sculpture. He asks her to pose for his sculpture. Blanche comes out and she insults Rose. She exits to grab something she forget, and Rose agrees to pose. Later in the kitchen, Sophia tries another practical joke on Dorothy. Dorothy avoids the first two jokes, but the whoopee cushion gets her. Blanche comes in the back door extremely upset. She saw some of his sketches. She’s insulted by what she saw. Rose shows her the key to Lalzo’s studio. Blanche has a meltdown. Dorothy comes out to see what they are fighting about. She breaks up the fight by showing them both her key. Rose exclaims the woman in the horrible drawings must be Dorothy. Blanche storms off. They move into the kitchen. Sophia asks what is going on. When Rose tells her they’ve all been posing nude for an artist, she thinks it’s just to shut her up. She leaves the kitchen. Dorothy points out that Lazlo does not know who he wants to use. Blanche then sits on the whoopee cushion. Blanche wants them all to make a pact that they don’t go back. Rose wants them to confront Lazlo. The three arrive at Lazlo’s studio. Rose tells him they want him to decide. He tells them he won’t decide until he actually makes the sculpture. It’s now the night of the unveiling. Rose is worried about the statue being naked. The sculpture is unveiled, and Blanche exclaims it is her. The three fight again. They ask Lazlo who it is. He explains he wanted to convey strength and character, so he used Dorothy. Then he used some sketches of Blanche and then Rose. He tells them the statue is all three of them. Blanche then asks if he is romantically interested in anyone there. His boyfriend joins them. Back at the house, Sophia tells Dorothy her practical joking days are over. Sophia gets her with the dribble glass again.