Family Matters S01, Ep05 – Straight A’s

Show: Family Matters
Season: 1
Episode: 5
Title: Straight A’s
Original Air Date: October 20, 1989

Guest Stars:
Randy Josselyn: Rodney Beckett

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Favorite Quotes:

* Rachel: You know I haven’t colored in years. I forgot how good I was. Notice my use of contrast and shadowing to create the illusion of depth.
Judy: Too bad you didn’t stay in the lines.

* Harriet: Carl just open them. This ritual is as much fun as a root canal.

* Carl: Here’s your $25.
Laura: I’ll take it, but I’m not happy.

* Laura: 5 times 6 is 30. He can’t even multiply.

* Harriet: If you call me report card lady one more time you’ll spend the night in detention.

* Laura: No, I don’t deserve to have fun until I get an A in History.

* Laura: No thanks. Cookies will make me happy. I don’t deserve to be happy. Got any liver?

Synopsis: Eddie is listening to music and watching TV simultaneously downstairs. Carl is horrified and shuts it all off. At the table Rachel colors with the girls. Carl comes in the kitchen. He’s worried about Eddie and his study habits. Carl comes down the stairs to do his report card routine. He pays each kid $5 per A. Judy got 2 A’s for $10. Laura has all A’s, until there is a B. She’s upset and gets $25. But Eddie’s report card is straight A’s. Everyone is shocked. The next day Laura is still depressed about her knee. Rodney comes over and plays a prank on Rachel. She is not amused. He goes up to Eddie’s room. Rodney breaks the news to him that the report cards are fake. He made them up. Eddie is upset. The next day Laura is still depressed, she even turns down fresh baked cookies. Harriet tries to cheer her up, it doesn’t work. Laura explains she wants to go to a good law school. Rachel also tries to comfort her but fails. Harriet starts talking about the cookies and that because one has a flaw so the whole batch has to be thrown out. Laura does get the “message.” Carl brings in college brochures for Eddie. He also got him a Bears jacket. Eddie tries to tell him what happened but Carl cuts him off. When Carl mentions Columbia University Eddie thinks its a country. Also, a Harvard recruiter is coming. Eddie talks to Rachel and tells her the truth about the report cards. He’s upset still because his B’s and C’s aren’t good enough for his dad. He decides he needs to tell his dad the truth. Carl calls Eddie into the kitchen. He got him a computer. Eddie tells Carl his report card was fake and Carl wants it to be a joke. He’s upset, but so is Eddie. Carl did not realize he was making Eddie feel stupid. Carl goes up to Eddie’s room and apologizes. Back in the kitchen Carl has decided to calm down on grades. Harriet is thrilled to no longer be the report card lady. Rachel comes in the kitchen and tells them the Harvard recruiter is there. Rachel will take care of it since he’s so cute.

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