Show: The Golden Girls
Title: Forgive Me, Father
Original Air Date: February 14, 1987
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* Blanche: I know honey, but take a chance, be a woman.
* Blanche: With a little help from us I think she could fire Cupid’s arrow into the tushy of love.
Rose: Tushy of Love? For some strange reason I find that provocative.
* Blanche: Oh God, now I’m lying to a priest.
* Frank: We do a lot things real people do.
Blanche: Except for one very important thing. Boy is that going to put a hitch in Dorothy’s plans.
* Frank: You look lovely tonight.
Dorothy: I look like the mother of a solid gold dancer.
* Sophia: Don’t date a priest, it’s bad luck.
* Sophia: I thought I heard voices. Now I see that only two of them are God fearing.
* Dorothy: No matter how strongly you feel I cannot let you leave the priesthood for me.
* Dorothy: If you’re not leaving the priesthood then I’ve just made a complete ass of myself. Excuse my langue Father, but as an English teacher I can tell you that’s the most appropriate description.
Synopsis: Rose comes home and is upset. Another driver was verbally abusive to her. Sophia is trying to get her bingo kit together. She tells Rose she should have shouted back at the guy. She shows Rose a few gestures. Dorothy and Blanche come home and are concerned about a guy she has spent two Saturday mornings working on booths with. He has not asked her out yet. Blanche tells Dorothy to go after him herself. Blanche decides to teach Dorothy some new moves by role playing with her. Dorothy is horrified. It’s now the next Saturday. She nearly gives Frank a heart attack. She then gives him some coffee. They have some banter. She then asks him over for dinner. It’s now the night of dinner and bingo. Dorothy comes out and Blanche does not approve of her outfit. She tells her to find something brighter to wear. In the kitchen, Blanche and rose discuss Dorothy’s crush on Frank. The doorbell rings and it’s Frank. He’s dressed as a priest. Blanche thinks he’s collecting money. When he introduces himself she turns into a blathering idiot. Frank realizes Dorothy did not know he was a priest. Rose joins them. She starts going on but she does not realize he’s a priest. Dorothy comes out and sees his cleric’s clothes. She’s livid. He assumed that she knew. It becomes awkward and they sit at opposite ends of the couch. They survive a strange dinner. Rose asks him quite a few odd questions back in the house that leaves him just shocked and silent. In the kitchen, Blanche tries to tell Dorothy that she sees something in Frank’s eyes. They start to fight as they head back into the living room Sophia arrives home. She is upset about her bingo game. She suddenly asks about Dorothy’s date. Rose tells her that Father Lehy is her date. Sophia looks shocked. She asks Dorothy to chat with her. Frank makes a hasty exit but does ask to have dinner with Dorothy. He tells her he’s about to make a very important decision to leave the church. Dorothy can’t sleep she had a nightmare. Rose comes back with a cheesecake and ice cream. Rose tells them how she and Charlie almost didn’t get together. There was a feud between the two families. Sophia has to rub it in to Dorothy. Sophia goes to church to confession, sort of. She thinks Frank is in the confessional but it’s another priest. He’s walking around in the church talking with the pastor. He’s decided to be a teaching priest. Dorothy arrives and finds Frank to talk. The conversation is another misunderstanding. As their whole relationship has been. She is mortified. But he tells her that she’s helped him see where he can do the most good. Frank and Dorothy hug as Sophia comes out of the confessional, horrified.