Show: The Golden Girls
Season: 3 Episode: 3
Title: Bringing Up Baby
Original Air Date: October 3, 1987
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Favorite Quotes:* Rose: I found out this morning I’m going to be a mother again.
Dorothy: Rose, we’ve been over this 100 times, you cannot get pregnant using the toilet at the mall.
* Dorothy: Ma! This is the kitchen.
Sophia: Oh boy. If this is the kitchen then I’m poaching an egg in the toilet.
* Rose: What does Spock know about raising babies? On Vulcan all the kids are born in pods.
* Rose: In a lot of ways, he reminds me of Jimmy Dean.
Dorothy: The actor or the sausage?
* Blanche: This is found money. This is fun money. This is hot beaches and sweaty men money. This is get naked and roll around on the ground money.
Dorothy: Even your money has more fun than I do.
* Dorothy: Four grown women decide to live with a pig and he as the mental problem?
* Dorothy: Are you trying to tell us that pig is dying of home sickness?
* Blanche: I think Baby looks a whole lot better today.
Rose: A pig isn’t supposed to be green, Blanche.
Sophia arrives home asking Dorothy if she is at the right address. She broke her glasses and can’t see. Blanche comes out asking about jewelry to go with her outfit. Rose comes home looking upset. She tells them she is going to be a mother again. Everyone is confused. She is getting a baby. Her uncle died and left her custody of his baby. Dorothy surprises everyone by telling them she has always wanted to raise another baby. She volunteers to help Rose. They all wind up deciding they want to help Rose. Dorothy asks if it’s a boy or a girl but Rose doesn’t know. Everyone leaves the living room but Sophia. She tries to get to her room but winds up in the street nearly getting hit. Later, Sophia goes in the kitchen thinking it’s the bathroom. Rose shows Dorothy a photo album with her uncle that just passed away. Blanche is actually reading a book about childcare in the living room. The doorbell rings and the man is her Uncle’s lawyer. They learn the baby is a male. The baby is a pig. Blanche does not want the pig in the house. Once the lawyer states that Rose was left $100,000 to take care of Baby. She has to take care of the pig for the rest of its life. This one happens to be 4 years past the standard life expectancy. This makes it more appealing. Another day the pig goes out on the lanai and eats Sophia’s snack. Dorothy brings her the new glasses. Rose joins them and gushes about how nice it is to have a pig again. Dorothy only cares about when the pig will die. Blanche comes out on the lanai upset about her lingerie getting eaten. This upsets Rose and she tells them she will try to rehome the pig. Dorothy points out to Blanche the money that comes with the pig. Rose then asks someone else to feed the pig tomorrow while she is at work. Sophia reads them the riot act. They offer to cut her in so she will feed him. Rose screams, the pig has collapsed. In the kitchen, Blanche tries to comfort Rose and it doesn’t work. Rose exits the kitchen, and they all discuss what they plan to do with their share. It’s another day and the girls have come back from a shopping spree. Rose comes out with a gentleman, but it’s a vet. The vet says he does not have much time left. The vet explains that Baby is having trouble adjusting to his new surroundings. Rose is overcome with guilt and decides to send him home. The others get upset. Rose thinks his health is more important. Sophia points out he’s not a real doctor. Each tries to convince her that Baby staying is the best. Later, Dorothy is overcome with guilt about spending their fortune on silly things. Blanche has spent all their money on one thing: a Mercedes. Dorothy wants to give up the money and send Baby home. Blanche wants the car so bad she offers Dorothy one of her four sons. Dorothy and Blanche go to Rose’s room. Dorothy wants to confess about her selfishness in regard to the pig and money. Blanche tries to play innocent. When she flashes the photo of the farm in front of the pig he squeals. Blanche has a meltdown. Both Dorothy and Blanche beg Rose for forgiveness. She tells a kiss would be nice, but they don’t kiss the pig, they kiss Rose instead. Sophia joins them and is not happy that the other three have decided to send the pig home. In the kitchen, Sophia finally has her normal glasses again. Rose got a letter about Baby. He died 36 hours after returning to the farm. Then the Mercedes gets towed. They all jump in and ride in it getting towed back to the dealership.
Categories: The Golden Girls