Title: All My Exes Live in Essex
Original Air Date: November 26, 2015
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* Joan: I’m just saying maybe we should have figured out how to unlock them before we put them on.
* Denise: Whatever she took, maybe it was worth killing over.
* Sherlock: May I assume you’ve cleared up the confusion with Det. Cortez?
Joan: No you may not.
* Joan: I don’t think I’m a suspect. I think it’s personal, she’s messing with me.
* Sherlock: Whatever she was doing here, someone wanted to keep it a secret.
* Joan: I take it you’ve never used a consultant before.
Cortez: No, I’ve never used a consultant before. Real cops do the job themselves. That’s how it works. You don’t belong.
Joan: I don’t know what to tell you detective, I’m not going anywhere.
* Sherlock: You can apprise me of your meeting with your stalker as we sort.
Joan: I think she’s insane because she’s fixating on me.
* Joan: And that would be bad for you, right? Getting your ass kicked by a consultant?
* Sherlock: You allowed Cortez to land too many punches.
Joan: I did, but all that matters is that I landed the last one.
Synopsis: Joan and Sherlock are having an escape from handcuffs contest. Joan’s phone goes off and he complains about the ringtone, while she comments he still hasn’t cracked the passcode to unlock it. It’s a call form one of Joan’s colleagues at the hospital she worked at. The woman is clearly distraught over the missing employee. While checking her workstation, she gets a text from one of her friends. Sherlock notices that Abby’s workstation has been thoroughly cleaned and scrubbed while the rest have not. He notices strange prints on the floor. He’s found evidence of a gurneys sticky footprint and leads to a room with a gurney. She thinks it might be some kind of surgery suite. It’s where donor bodies are turned into teaching tools. Sherlock announces Abby Campbell is dead. There is a skeleton posed and its teeth match Abby. She is definitely dead. Bell confirms that it is Abby’s skeleton and a full investigation starts. Sherlock suspects she was choked as the hyoid bone is the only part of the skeleton missing. Joan meets her friend at a coffee shop. She was visited by a Gina Cortez with all kinds of questions about Joan. Abby’s husband is brought in for questioning, he’s also a doctor. He tells her that Abby had pancreatic cancer and was dying. He was giving her chemo to give her more time. Joan comes home to find Sherlock in the media room watching hospital security cameras and he’s picked an odd soundtrack. All he found was suspicious pleasantness. He’s discovered Abby was having an affair. The man she was having an affair with can’t be reached. Sherlock asks Joan about her meeting. Det. Cortez is investigating Joan. Their conversation is interrupted by a phone call. Abby’s husband is acting weirdly. They go to see him. Dr. Fisher is there. Both doctors were married to Abby at the same time. The two doctors were already together, Abby joined them. Her previous relationship involved 5 people counting Abby. Gregson is up to speed and the members of the previous “marriage” are all brought in. They all complain about Abby. It was made clear that Denise and Abby did not get along. They all point the finger at Denise. Turns out Denise is a lawyer and it’s uncooperative. Denise tells them that she and Abby buried the hatchet and shows them proof. Joan pays Det. Cortez a visit at her station. Cortez just harasses her even though Joan was trying to act in good faith. When she arrives home, Sherlock assumes the situation is solved, but she informs him it’s not. Cortez might just be going after Joan for kicks. Sherlock moves back to Abby. She could have been stealing eggs and selling them. The two pay a visit to an old colleague of Abby’s regarding stem cells and embryos. Turns out Abby wanted access to his lab, he agreed if she supplied him with embryos. They go to his lab, but it’s been burned down. The two bring Gregson up to speed. They thought Abby thought someone in the lab was up to no good and she was running paternity tests. The waste disposal bin is unharmed, Gregson requests a warrant to get the contents. Joan, meanwhile, pays Cortez another visit. Joan lays out her thoughts on Vesay. She gives her the investigation file. But Cortez throws it on the floor. She’s pissed that Joan looked into Vesay at all. She resents her being a consultant. They have some interesting words. Cortez tells Joan she caught a new case that will keep her busy for a while, but she might circle back. Joan meets Sherlock at the morgue. There’s a lot of waste to go through. Sherlock categorizes the situation with Cortez as a beef. He suggests a way to solve it. Sherlock finds six vials with Abby’s writing on it. The three (Bell included) meet with a leader of a support group. She doesn’t want to talk about the blood tests. She finally tells them Abby had told them about a study she might be able to get some of the members into it. A husband, Kirk Abromovich, threatened Abby if she wouldn’t stop harassing his wife. Turn’s out this woman was Abby’s husbands patient. Joan goes with the wife to check on their son. They discuss the cancer. Joan tells her she use to be a surgeon and asks if she can take a look. Joan agrees she’ll make a full recovery. Joan tells them as she leaves that she knows who killed Abby and that Mrs. Abromovich does not have cancer. They bring Dr. Campbell back in. Her diagnosis does not match her condition. The Dr.’s lawyer agrees with the misdiagnosis. Then they put his files on the table. They contacted all his patients that he diagnosed with cancer. Most agreed to be retested. Almost 1/3rd of his patients don’t have cancer. It was his wife, Abby, who figured out the scam he was running. Bell has him dead to rights. He agrees to tell them everything. Joan pays Cortez a visit at the gym this time. She asks Cortez to have a fight. Cortez challenges her to one right then. That night Joan has her hand in a bucket of ice. Sherlock makes her his own poultice. They discuss the fight and Joan makes a point. She landed the last blow and won the fight.