Show: Mama’s Family
Title: A Grave Mistake
Original Air Date: April 7, 1984
* Fran: As I recall Carl’s little slip of the tongue went, “Frances Crowley, if I ever catch you in my house again, I’m going to blast your butt with buckshot.”
* Naomi: If I visited every man who gave me a husband, I’d spend half my life tiptoeing through the tombstones.
* Vint: Daddy is not really in that cemetery.
Thelma: Well he better be, it cost me $1200 bucks to have him put there.
* Thelma: She gave up the cemetery for you, huh?
Michael: Yes, ma’am.
* Naomi: Ms. Harper that is either your imagination or you are going bonkers.
* Thelma: If you ask me someone shot the dots off their dice years ago.
* Thelma: There’s a strange woman laying in my grave. Carl B Harper, what the hell are you up to?
* Vint: How dumb do you think we are?
Ellen: I may need a chalkboard to answer that question.
* Naomi: We may not be the smartest people you know Ellen but at least we aren’t hypocrites.
* Ellen: Vint will you see to your wife? Her muzzle slipped again.
* Thelma: Dying don’t change people, you know how cheap he was. God rest his soul.
* Naomi: Oh Ms. Harper you haven’t done anything.
Thelma: Well not by your standards maybe. All marriage means to you is shaking the sheets.
* Thelma: Sonia, either forgive this creep or come down here and put him out of his misery.
Synopsis: Everyone waits expectantly while Thelma comes out of the bathroom. It’s Carl’s birthday and she is going to visit him at the cemetery. She berates everyone for not going with her to the cemetery. Fran refuses to go with her. She’s not his biggest fan since he threatened to shoot her with a shotgun. She has no success in getting anyone to go with her. Thelma and Vint get in a fight over it. Sonia’s date arrives and everyone is staring at him. Vint asks him if his grandparents are still alive. They’ve all past, the only one he was close to was buried at sea. Sonia drags Michael out of the house for their date. Thelma informs them that Carl still communicates with her from time to time, but Naomi tells her she is nuts. Thelma visits with Carl and has a good conversation with him. She does make a point of telling him about Vint’s new wife, Naomi. She gets quite a shock when she looks at the grave that’s supposed to be hers and discovers another woman is already in it. Back at the house, Fran is playing mononoply with Vint and Noami. Ellen comes over to take Thelma to visit Carl. She’s an hour late like she is every year. Ellen takes a jab at them, but Naomi takes her down nicely. But Ellen has a strong comeback. They fight but it comes to an end when they hear sobbing coming from the porch. Thelma is sobbing. She tells them Carl is having an affair with a strange woman. She locks herself in the bathroom and tells them what happened. Fran tries to make a joke but it doesn’t help. The three try to comfort her. Ellen offers to take her back to the cemetery so she can get to the bottom of it. Thelma and Ellen are in the cemetery directors office trying to find out what happened. Ellen tells him the name on the grave and he says she is three plots away. It turns out there’s been a mistake. Carl’s tombstone was placed on the wrong grave, he’s two plots down. Thelma nearly chokes the man to death. This upsets Thelma even more though because she’s been visiting the wrong grave all these years. Back at the house everyone is discussing the situation. Thelma comes downstairs and sits in her chair. She’s still very upset. Naomi tries to make her feel better but winds up getting attacked. Sonia comes back from her picnic and she’s not happy. Buzz takes her aside and tells her what’s happened. Fran has had enough, she decides to go out to Carl’s grave and explain what happened. Thelma insists that Carl has to send her a sign, a gift. The doorbell rings suddenly and it’s Michael. He’s come over to grovel. He’s even brought flowers. Thelma loses her patience and yells at Sonia to forgive him or put him out of his misery. Vint suggests he leaves. He gives Thelma the flowers her brought for Sonia. She feels they are the sign from Carl. She tells them she’s allergic to this specific flower which is why they are from Carl. She runs to the bathroom and flushes them.